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Tuesday, June 08, 2004
Well, if you wanted honestly, that's all you had to say
wait, what? im okay? what the hell was i thinking, im not okay... this is just going to make it next to impossible to trust anyone again. i was down and then i just got thrown on my face. this is so bad. this is gonna hurt me so much in the long run. i dont know how im gonna trust anyone anymore. why didnt i see it this time? i continue to trust these people and then i just get fucked in the end. im so god damned stupid... i just wanted to see something there. fuck it, i'm done................................
Posted at 6:46 pm by Atwood
So me and meri are over for now, but its cool cause it was fun while it lasted. maybe when some stuff blows over, we can give it another shot. that's all for now
Posted at 1:06 pm by Atwood
Monday, June 07, 2004
Well they're never gonna get me, like a bullet through a flock of doves
wow. life's getting interesting. drama fucking everywhere. the whole bryan/rustin/chloe/veronica thing... whoa, thats a mess. and me and meri. i dont even know whats going on there right now. today was... different. meri didnt show up so no news there. ashfield is going to start practicing twice a week, so thats a good thing. i was operating on 5 hours of sleep all day (i couldnt sleep last night, so much to think about.) me and bryan are already making plans for another insane weekend. if this is ANYTHING what this summer is gonna be, we're gonna have a blast (we're gonna get busted and totally fucked by the end of the summer, but itll be so worth it.) i hope that bryan and veronica get together. bryan's one of my best friends already and i just met veronica but she's a REALLY cool chick. they're really good for each other. i want to see that work out. so good luck to them, i hope all goes well. tomorrow's looking to be another confusing day, this is like a fucking soap opera, yo!
Current Music
My Chemical Romance, "You Know What They Do to Guys Like Me in Jail"
Motion City Soundtrack, "Throwdown"
Name Taken, "You Do it So Well"
My Chemical Romance, "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)"
Posted at 5:46 pm by Atwood
Sunday, June 06, 2004
something bad happened to meri today... i feel something, i dunno what it is, i cant describe it. i dont know why i feel it. its such a wierd feeling. i think its helplessness, i want to help her but i cant. this isnt any of my business but i feel wierd.. i dunno even what to say about it. i dont think she knows that i care about her this much. she might think its dumb that i feel like this way, cause we havent known each other that long. i wish i could do something. this is all too familiar... i hope she doesnt think that im prying into her business... i didnt mean to. i just saw it. i dunno what else to say, so thats all.
Posted at 5:37 pm by Atwood
Cause I feel like I'm inside out, you've got me upside down
last night was... i dont even know. i finally got to hang out with meri and her just being there was amazing. but nothing really huge happened between because there was just so much pressure from my friends and the tension was so hard to take. i wish it was just me and her there cause i can talk to her when we're alone and everyone's not telling me what to say or what to do. i hope she gives me a chance to be with her when its just the two of us cause i want to make a better impression on this girl because she makes me feel so incredible when im around her. we dont even have to talk, i just feel it when she's around... i've got a lot more to say but i dont have time to write... ill continue this later
Posted at 8:41 am by Atwood
Thursday, June 03, 2004
Did you notice I was afraid? I thought I'd run out of things to say...
so today was kinda a big day for me... i talked to meri about this whole thing thats going on and we've decided that we're gonna hang out before we start dating or anything like that... and i'm totally cool with that. she gave me a note which was really cool. she's a really rad girl. i'm thinking i wouldve regretted switching out of spanish earlier this year. anyway, tomorrow's friday and i dont think me and bryan are going to 4th block. 3 blocks of school, yo! fun. then i think we're going to some party with carlos which should be sick. besides all of that, there's nothing else going on................... yeah, i'm stoked, niggs!!
Current Music
New Found Glory, "The Story So Far"
From First to Last, "Secrets Don't Make Friends"
Classic Case, "Down and Out"
Posted at 12:47 pm by Atwood
Tuesday, June 01, 2004
Alright, already, we'll all float on, alright, don't worry...
i gotta start updating more often so that i wont have to fit everything into one massive post. well, 2 1/2 weeks left in school- that's great. not much has happened up until this weekend. damn fun weekend. bryan and i started it off early by skipping math last block on friday and going downtown. while we were headed for a girl's car who was giving us a lift downtown i got hit by a stray water balloon (it was the seniors' last day of school.) on the way downtown we listened to modest mouse- very cool! me and bryan chilled at dunkin' donuts for a while and then headed back to school. while waiting for rustin's mom to show up and take us to band practice our math teacher came outside so we bolted. funny shit. after practice we headed to my first show as a part of Ashfield at Austin Prep. what a mistake this show was. the people we played for were all total dicks, the equipment was shit and almost every band acted like total assholes to us. the mic they had me singing into was a chorus mic (the thin mics with the little ball-type mic at the end, like they use on gameshows) there was massive feedback when i sang and wherever i sang i was either too quiet or too loud. oh well. we were only playing the show as a favor to our friend carlos moran anyway. we'll be recording soon, hoorah. the after-party at Rustin's house was fun, though. after the party-type thing, me, bryan, and carlos went out and egged some houses. SO fun. then we got kicked out of rustin's house and had to go to bryan's. then we went skating in north andover and broke some glass... more fun! then bryan came back to my house and we went to lauren's. egged more houses. back to my house with eric, cronin, mark, and bryan. we skated, watched tv and then egged ANOTHER house. very fun. eric's dad spent 2 hours trying to get to my house, but he didnt get into trouble, eric just showed him the emo face and everything was fine. the next day john and i went to salem and picked up new cell phones. the phones are fucking SICK. i have Float On as my ring tone... SO pimp. that was pretty much the entirety of the weekend. something similiar will probably happen next weekend. here's hoping... oh yeah, and the Atwood Movie is currently in production! it's coming out really well so far, so keep a look out for updates on that. not much to say about my love life except that i think something big may be coming as soon as tomorrow. i'll keep everyone updated. peace, niggs!
Current Music
Modest Mouse, "Float On"
The Academy Is..., "Season"
The Academy Is..., "The Author"
Taking Back Sunday, "This Photo is the Proof (I Know You Know)"
Reel Big Fish, "Dateless Losers"
Posted at 4:43 pm by Atwood
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
I am flawed but I am cleaning up so well...
alright, definitely time for an update... again with the girls? hell's yeah. but first let me just say that i joined a new band, Ashfield, with my good friends black bart, cox, rustin and freelee. we have a show this friday. should be cool. anyways... back to the girls... or girl. there's this girl that i have a thing for, she's really cool, and word is, she has a thing for me too. she's awesome... im sick over what i'm gonna say to her. i really dont want to blow this. i dont have much time to write, ill talk more tomorrow. later~
Current Music
Dashboard Confessional, "Vindicated"
Taking Back Sunday, "A Decade Under the Influence"
Pretty Girls Make Graves, "Speakers Push the Air"
Posted at 8:46 pm by Atwood
Sunday, May 09, 2004
1. studded belt - 2 points: 2 points
2. dyed black hair - 2 points: 2 points
3. thick rimmed glasses - 2 points: 0 points
4. tight shirts/pants - 2 points each: 6 points
5. gaudy belt buckle - 2 points each: 4 points
6. clothing bought from a thrift store - 2 points each: 0 points
7. having hair with bangs longer than the rest - 2 points: 0 Points
8. trucker hats - 2 points: 2 points
9. messenger bag - 3 points: 0 points.
10. livejournal/myspace/friendster account - 2 points each: 6 Points
11. saucony/new balance/converse shoes - 2 points per pair: 2 points
12. mountain climbing key thingy - 2 points: 2 points
13. X'd up mosh gloves - 10 points: 0 points
14. scarf - 2 points: 0 points
15. refering to bands as acronym - 2 points: 2 points
16. vegan diet - 5 points: 0 points
17. vegetarian diet - 0 points
18. food not bombs participation - 5 points: 0 points
19. straight edge - 5 points: 0 points
20. aspiring photographer - 3 points: 0 points
21. using adj from the late 80's/ early 90's (i.e. rad, gnarly, rockin', etc.) 1 point for each word in vernacular: 2 points
22. pins/buttons 1/2 point each: 1 1/2 points
23. plugs/body piercings - 2 points each: 0 points
24. vinyl collection - 10 points: 10 points
25. moldy peaches fan - 10 points: 0 points
26. liking metal seriously - deduct 5 points: 0 points
27. liking metalcore - 5 points: 0 points.
28. reading books over 300 pages long - 3 points: 0 points
39. riding a bike - 5 points: 0 points
30. participating in "the mosh" - 5 points: 5 points
31. tea aficianado - 5 points: 0 points
32. writing poetry - 5 points: 0 points
33. attended 50 shows or more in a year - 2 points: 0 points
34. attending hell fest - 5 points: 0 points
35. being in a band - 5 points: 5 points
36. working at a record store/health food store - 5 points: 0 points
37. clapping during midpaced part of a song - 5 points: 5 points
my score: 56.5, bitches
0-24 - poser! get out or be forced out.
25-44 - beginner. attend more shows, buy more records, you'll be fine.
45-74 - scenester. you've been around awhile and you know what's up, good job.
75 or more - GOD! i bow to thee with your knowledge of everything hardcore
Posted at 6:26 pm by Atwood
All in all, this chapter's not bad. It's a book I'm glad I read
alright, haven't been updating often lately, sorry about that. I've been managing two different websites and i have a lot of work to do with Atwood (which i'll explain later on in the entry.) Our band, Adelaide got two new members, both good friends of ours- mark branzetti on drums and bryan black on guitar and providing backup vocals. i'm still sort-of bassist, but i'm pretty much just vocals again. so i put together an Adelaide website and that took up a chunk of time with updates and such. then Atwood of course... the shirts have really taken off (haha, that was a good pun) everyone's wearing atwood, and so many people are into it. we've just about payed off the cost of printing, so the rest of the shirts we're going to give away so that we get the word out to everyone. there's a big show next friday, the 14th, there will be plenty of bands there and me and john are going to come out during different sets and give away a few shirts. meanwhile, we're also gonna be filming backstage for the Atwood DVD (more details in a few days.) so that's where half of the shirts are going. the other half are going to Andover Radio along with a compilation of underground emo/punk/indie bands to get people into music that they probably wouldnt have ever heard. Andover Radio is going to take a few lucky listeners and give away that prize package (which includes 1 shirt and 1 compilation CD) so that's gonna be rad. i guess that's really it for now... EXCEPT for Piebald on the 23rd! going to the CD release party with lauren- should be AWESOME! that's about it for now, i'll try to update as often as possible. later homies~
Current Music
The Movielife, "Takin' it Out and Choppin' it Up"
The Movielife, "Face or Kneecaps"
The Postal Service, "Clark Gable"
Cauterize, "Killing Me"
Twilight City Fracture, "Eviscerate Your Local Supemodel"
Fallout Boy, "Grand Theft Autumn"
Fallout Boy, "Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner"
Motion City Soundtrack, "Throwdown"
Posted at 7:53 am by Atwood
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